Hi parents or friends of parents,
Before I became a mother I envisioned that I would simply integrate my children into my busy fun life. Turns out babies/toddlers are not as portable as they look. Here is another thing I learned, toddlers have minds, emotions and most certainly plans of their own. They are human beings after all…apparently. Being a mother is the hardest thing I have ever done. It has brought out the absolute best in me and also the worst. (Truth? Or mother guilt?). Bottom line, I am madly in love with my children and I am obsessed with their chubby little faces. But, like I said, parenting has definitely exposed all my weakness, I have discovered weaknesses and character flaws I never knew I had (that happens when you are trying to be perfect.) What I do know is that no one is a perfect parent, actually there is no such thing. The unconditional love and commitment of a child is so touching, no matter how our day goes, my babies reach for me, call for me and want to be in my arms. I savour this bond because I know this attachment won’t last forever. After exploring many methods of dealing with the tough parts of toddlers (tantrums in particular) I found a lot of the tips and tactics didn’t suit me or my child. My son is very emotional, he doesn’t really care about time-outs or taking things away, he needs to be heard no matter what. I am the same way. Every child is so different and responds to discipline in a different way. I have dug deep in order to find a way to parent effectively. Here are a few ideas I have been working with. I feel they are helping improve the energy flow between my children and I. Let me know what you think xoxo Anna.
1- Impatience=resistance. What you resist persist. For every reaction there is an equal and opposite reaction. There are so many ways to say it and it has been noted over time, but for some reason it is my biggest struggle…patience. Probably the most common meditation mantras and prayers that I use, are about patience and asking for the ability to go with the natural flow of the universe. Try this when parenting, you may not realize that you a creating a negative charge with your child through impatience.
2- Surrender and pray. Energy can create resistance and can create tension or power struggles, a lot of this is non verbal, so you may not realize it is happening. Let go of tension and heavy energy and try to tune into the present moment, take your time and slow down, You and your toddler may just be having a communication breakdown.
3-Shift your thinking. The goal is not to create an obedient child but to create a kind and productive member of society. I personally like to get things done, but I am trying to realize that my goal as a mother isn’t necessarily running a perfectly efficient ship, but to create warm, open hearted and confident people, who can then go share this energy with others.
Just a thought 🙂